If you were alone in a forest...

(I wrote this many moons ago and got lost on FB)

if u were alone in a forest and farted, would it be wrong to blame it on the trees?

if u were alone in a forest and had a *wet* fart, would it be wrong to not change your pants and keep walking?

if u were alone in a forest and needed to fart, would it be wrong to not hold it and just let it rip?

if u were alone in a forest, would it be wrong to try and light your fart?

further to the above, if you burnt yourself, would it be wrong to cry and have a fit like a baby?

further to the above, would it be wrong to blame it on the trees?

all kinds of dilemma when u are alone in a forest